Why wait for the full moon night

Why wait for the full moon night

Your smile bathes the night every day

Why wait for the night

It is there in the smile of day

Each leaf each rock

Nay the very sod I tread

Why wait at the gates

When you are there

In my breath

And in every sigh 

Of the mountain breeze

And in the wing of the bird 

In flight on an invisible swing

Why wait for your honeyed voice

I hear you in the sounds

Of the silent trees

That sway as the breeze sings

I hear you in the quiet

Pierced by bird song

And in my shrine of stillness

Amidst the winds of thoughts

Knocking at my doors

Why wait to sleep in the sea

Of your eyes

They stretch all over me blue

From star to star and cloud to cloud

I wash your smiles

With my tears that don't stop

And the milky glow

Shines brighter

With each drop

That bite my eyes

They trickle down your snowy robes

A stream of joy

And wash your feet 

Wherever they go

Sita's dream

Going up the serpentine

Steps So narrow and long

Like a tunnel into the sky's end

Yet I moved fearlessly along

My limbs crushed

By the surrounding walls

Was it my head or my feet?

They all went up 

All the way

Panting.

It was as if nothing could stop

Harpies, little dragon birds

And bats flew down.

Nothing stopped

As my body and soul

went Up

Round and round

Up the curving steps

That did not seem to end

Yet the climb was joy

To meet the one

I knew was there,

Waiting and urging me on.

And there he was

His limb hung down

It was the tip of a tail

That will burn a city of gold

To unite my captive heart

With its lord.

And yet the joy must yet await

Another climb

Another journey long

Across the seas 

And lands

Of patient wait

Till my heart breaks 

And I find Thee.

Why mothers don't die

Tell me child why you

Want balloons.

And then you cry

When they burst

With a bang.

There was too much breeze 

From the window;

It was the western wind

That broke them;

The yellow then the green.

Tears as big as them

Shook the earth.

The breeze too stopped

For a while;

Till you got a white

One this time.

And what if this too goes

The same way child?

Will you again flood the room

And send me afloat to

The town for more?

Balloons don't live

Forever,

Who will tell the child?

So mothers don't die

Till every child has a balloon

Each time they cry.

You never came

When I woke up you were gone

Your robes soiled lay

On the floor

Waiting to be washed 

With sun beams

And the froth of the western breeze

 I searched everywhere

For you

No one answered

My cries echoed back to me

Then I saw you again

And you said you never came

As you never were gone

For you were the breeze

And the sun shine

That kissed all that was seen

Even the robes

I mistook for you

When the sun hid for some time

Make me not a tear drop

 Make me not a tear drop 

That will flow away

From your eyes;

Nor your breath that would 

Leave as it came;

Nor a shadow 

That is yet away from you;

Nor anything that

Must live away from you;

Indeed unmake Me.

And yet I ask not to

Be free,

But to be so bonded

To you that I never

Separate from thee.

Did you leave your fangs in heaven?

Did you leave your fangs

In heaven

Or hid them under the doorsteps

As you came hearing me cry? 

And your lion hues did you hide

In your eyes that now look

Muddled like an ocean

Of golden tears?

And your bloody nails

In the shoes you wore

As you came in a guise

You thought I never

Would know?

Do you now recline

In those eyes

Which like two boats

Row me to your arms

Faraway in me?

My angel of light

My angel of light
Kind light
Bathing the night of my being
Each ray glimmers and falls
Like a hand kind extended
To bless
Each ray like your foot
Stretched
For me to touch
And be blest
My angel of light
Your wings of silver
Sweep away the
Dust of dark and grime
Till I shine.
Bruised and cowering
In the womb of dark
In fear
Your light covers
Me embalmed
Till I know no pain
And my tears
Fall like pearls of light
To adorn your path
As you float and flow
An ocean of love
And fill my little puddle
Till it is fast asleep
On your breast
A moon full
That never ebbs
And my eyes blind
See nothing but
Your light
In a night that
Never ends
A night that is all light.

I went into the darkness

I went into the darkness
Into the womb of fear
And what bliss it was
To be so close to you
I stepped into the icy stream
Of my tears and let the torrent
Sweep me away
And I was all the time
In your arms so warm
I was lost in the woods
I lost the trail
And yet what joy
To find you there
Picking up the thorns on the way
And leading me home
 I would fain be lost
Be lost again
For I know you are watching
Somewhere from the bird nest
Or from the million twinkling
Eyes that look down
From above
Or the hidden beauties
That bloom right under my torn
Feet as I wander lost and in pain
Or some kind soul who
Would forsake a day to
Make me smile

Beginnings

When day breaks
Little does it suspect the end
That waits


When a child is born
His laughter knows not the
Pain that awaits
As he grows each day

When he takes the first step
He scarce sees the grave dug on every side

When  a heart is won
The bliss of love
Is blind to the scorn
that awaits its turn

To smother beneath
It's feet every memory


of joy

And make the loveliest face
Stir dread
And angels turn ghouls

Hence stay away
Keep your face
Veiled as ever


Never say a word

keep me in guile
Blinded by your light
If that is your wish
Let it be so
Let not my day dawn
Let us stay apart

Or I lose you forever

The monster egg

The green egg abandoned
Goes round in circles
To find the arms
That left it
Under the bare sky
With nothing
But itself
To feed on

It's tears flow out
In torrents
And yet it swallows them all
To quench the fires that
Smoulder in its belly

And like a curse or a blessing
The egg multiplies
And there are eggs wherever its skin
Is stretched
Each spot of green
Each drop of rain
Each pinch of sod
Has millions of eggs
They rain eggs all over her
What a blessing
Or is it a curse
To have so many
With none to feed
them on her breast

Birds

The birds fly each to its nest
As sun goes to make a new dawn
Somewhere and wake up
Other birds that sleep
In a dream of comfort
Only to wake up and
Fret and fear of losing their
Resting place
How they cry and scream
As they fly home
Some to their new found nests
Some to keep the nests safe
From blowing winds
Some fearing the worst
And some to make new homes
Their cries of joy and fear
Mingle in a tearing wail
As they chase each other
To outpace and out run

All in search of a nest of quiet
Where the wails stop
And there is no further chase
No fear of being hunted
And no need to hunt
The birds in the sky
And those in the roads
In their blaring wheels
Each to their nest
Not sure of tomorrow
Just done with the last rites
Having cremated a day
Sad or joyful
As they were
Yesterday
Each day
Either a nest blown away
Or a nest built
Never sure
Of what awaits them
As the sun sets
Or rises everyday
The eggs proliferate
And the birds come flying from nowhere
Filling the earth and sky
And there is no sign
Of the mother
Or father
All orphan eggs
Wailing away
In tears and joy that ends in fear
That it will go away

Chained

I see no chains yet I'm immobile
My lips move and yet
They are sealed
I. Breathe while I'm comatose
I speak and yet it isn't
My voice
Who is it
That possesses me
And holds me in thrall
That even my tears
Are forbidden to flow
And I move like a shadow
Lifting boulders
And hauling them up
The cliff and see
Them fall down again
And force me to lift them again
A sisyphusian slave
Is there no end
No way out
Of these invisible chains
That cement me to this
Cell of warm stinking
Tomb of wet flesh
Forever mauled by a stampede of
Rushing feet that never
Pause

Nobody

I don't know words
Or what they mean
Or they mean nothing
To you
Its garbage for one
Shoddy to another
And my tears
They are nothing
But a whim
Of some gland
And yet I write and I cry
For I was born for that
To sob and utter
Words
That no one can understand
There are foul smelling men
Who sleep on the street
You barely see
As you drive past
In your new cars
There are small joys
And smiles you
Have never known
As someone
Finds a treasure
In a discarded cloth
Or a kind look
That stole from your eye
As you spoke
To someone to kill time
One day my eyes would burn
With my fingers that write
In the pyre that time will light
And you must clap
With joy that you have fewer
Words now to read
And a face less to see
As you move on
Up the ladder
Past those who must forever sleep
On the wayside
Or underneath
A shroud of ashes and mud

The mud ball

This ball of mud goes round and round
In vain to see your face
To see you that surround
Endless
It spins like a dog
After its tail
In vain
And hurtles on
Not knowing why
Or where
Like a moth
Drawn by fire
And yet
It wants to be free
To be blown into the azure deep
Sea of space

Boatman

I wait in the boat
In the rocking waves
Alone
Waiting for you
It moves around
Up and down
Where the waves draw it
Rudderless
And I go with the flow
Are you the wave
Are you the whirl
Or the boat
Am I then
Just a straw in the wind
Blown away at whim
Are you the wind
Or the straw
Is it my fate
Then to be left alone
For you are either not there
Or conceal your face
In a veil
I can't see
Do you fear
Like me
Do you fear me
Or loathe
Not to extend your hand of love
And be by my side
Nay be me
Let the wind break me apart
Then and the waves suck me in
If that can be

Divine lullaby

You woke me up at midnight
And placed me in a cradle
Or was it your arms
And brushed your purple
Peacock brush on my tired limbs
And they tingled
And I seemed to swing
In a sheath of light
Was it a dream

was it my fancy
Did I float
Or was something floating in me
And then you rocked me to another dream
Of lights
Blazing through me
It was like a lightening
That was freezing in me
Till I woke up and longed
To be rocked again
In your swing of love
Will you come again to night
And rock me in your swing of melody
Where I know nothing but
The touch of your peacock crown?

The stream

The thin stream flows on
Through hills and plain
Not knowing whence
It came
And the length
It will go
Till the waters dry up
Or perchance
Meet the oceans
And live forever

It looks up for the rains
That may fall
Or even a drop of dew
Anything that can keep the flow
As it trickles down ravines
On its way
That it never planned
But became its way
As it flowed

Which is the path it should take
And which to spare
It has no mind to know
And even with a mind
Water has to flow ahead
Through any way the water will go
Does it wonder
Or remember
The icy bosom
From which it came
Do they still hold its roots
Far far away
Or have they been sundered

Leaving the stream
To  its lonely fate

The empty kumbh

The empty kumbh

I went to the Ganges full of joy
Full of hope that you are there now by my side
But when I came out of the waters
You were gone
And I found myself
Sit by the holy fire
You lit
And left for me to stare
Through the day and night
For three days
Till I had dried my tears
And burnt my body
My pain and joy
All turned into hot ash
That we all picked up I n pieces of paper and carried home
What was left
Was just an empty soul
A drop of water still
Separated from the river of joy
Aching to merge
And never to pine

A drop of rain

A drop of rain

Teach me to be blue without
A drop of paint
Teach me to fly
With no wings
Teach me to sing
A song that will make the heaven cry
And sweep me in a shower of joy
To make me another drop of rain
That can quench the earth dry
And sprout as a blade of grass
Or flow into the sea or the
Neighbouring drain
And make no Difference
To the drain or I

I see you

I saw you first with a squint
In my eyes
As you covered me in your hands wet
With love
I saw you as you fed me my first drops of life
I saw you when you made me take my first steps
Not knowing that I must fall
Again and again till I walked
I saw you as you poured love in my little basket of toys
I saw you in the rose bush all covered with white
And in the
Soothing dust on the iron doors
You kept closed
T save me from getting lost
As I licked them
I tasted. The earth and the rain
Ad I saw you in the birds that pecked about
In the garden with their chick
I saw you when you
Let me hold the kite
That touched the sky
And gave me all your marbles
You won
That I don't cry
I saw you

Dogs

Dogs

Where do I go with these dogs
There is a deluge of barks
And I sink and sink
They are hungry
And nothing
Is enough
On this valley of green
They will soon make me their
Feed
Let them
Or can I flee
And become a blade of grass
And never hear nor see
All I see are their fangs
Sharp and eyes
Desperate
And hear now their howls
Miserable
They must die
So I live
Or I must die

Refugee

I have found a place to hide
But the doors don't shut
The locks are broken
Every draught
Slams  them open
And I fear
They may
Come in
And drag me out

Who can I plead to
The wind has no ears
But arms that open closed doors
And let me out to
Mobs out there
Looking for prey